August 15, 2010

I haven't really "blogged" before besides writing poems and posting some good songs every now and then, so I guess I will start tonight.

Its 2 AM and I can't sleep. Today was long, good, and bad...a roller coaster I guess you can say. As my departure date for Portland keeps getting closer and closer, each day seems to be slipping by into thin air leaving me on edge. I do not know what to do with my last days here in this town I call home. Of course I will spend quality time with my family, friends, and peers, but I feel like I need to do so much more. It is as if I am in a dead zone, and there is nothing I can do because time is blinding me.

Time. 9 days now. Time and I haven't been getting along too well. Now I seem to understand when someone much older than me says "time passes quicker as you grow older" because it really does and it is quite frightening. But that is a part of life, and I am learning to cope with it. I have learned a lot these past few weeks and one word seems to surround each lesson: inevitable.

So much is on my mind; I am very overwhelmed and confused. I keep catching myself dazing off thinking about things that sadden me, and I blame my subconscious and fate for that. But I remind myself that the light is at the end of the tunnel, and I my future is very bright.

I have been living in the moment these past few months, and now it is time for me to not only live in the moment, but also live in the future. Prioritize and prepare- I will be experiencing a life changing experience in a matter of days.

I guess I should get some rest now, it is late.

Things I learned or relearned today:
-Always be the bigger person in every situation
-Anger doesn't solve problems
-Surround yourself by people that make you happy and love you dearly
-You can't please everyone (I have a hard time dealing with this one)
-Kindness is essential

Goodnight.